where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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