She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
