I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
