Dude my mom stole all your condoms
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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