I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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