I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
either way he was missing a nipple.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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