it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
