Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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