Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I could fuck to npr.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
