We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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