i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
