i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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