What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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