Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
