So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
