he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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