idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
