Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Randomize
