he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize