He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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