You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
