So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
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