She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
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