Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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