found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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