I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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