I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
