Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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