he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
love makes seman taste better
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Randomize
