Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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