Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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