you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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