He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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