nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Also, beer. Big fan.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
