There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
My penis needs a shock collar
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
