i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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