last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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