He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
