So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
