it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
