she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
