Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
