I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Randomize
