i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Randomize
