I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
