sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
