Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
