sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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