Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
