but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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