okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
